Tuesday, 22 December 2015

No This Book Is Not For You



So it's 630 AM.  I am functioning off of five hours of sleep and I'll be going for a run as soon as I'm done with this blog post.  At present I have two blog promos going on.  One for this book.  And one for this one.  This post is about virgil.  

I've already written a post here to about this but it seems to need resaying.  This book has graphically and explicit accounts of rape and physical abuse.  Ultimately it's supposed to be a story about how these things can change you, how the general public has misconception of these things, and how survival can come in forms beyond the garden variety norm.

Monday, 14 December 2015

Originality: What the fuck is that?


I'm sitting in the library trying to design a city for my book. I've read Tolkien, Trudy canavan, c.s. lewis, kris kirkpatric, george R. R. martin, Karen Miller, Rowling, and of course Guy Gavriel Kay. The list of authors from all genres I've read is endless and I realise it's next to impossible to build my maps, and grids without similarities. It's like traveling the world I live in now no matter what culture i'm in there are some base things that will be similar. So critics will say I stole this and it reminds them of that but there isn't much that I can do about that. Here in lies the problem.

Sunday, 13 December 2015

Everything Has A Beginning

So we are moving house.  Under normal circumstances this would just be something we are doing.  As it is we are actually buying a condo.  Yaaay fam.  We are moving up.  We have more space so instead of filling it with are crap we are actually sorting through everything and only keeping what we need.  Result: we will have more space and less stuff.  Say what.  But I digress.  Me being the seven day a week working adult I have only seen the place once.  Yup once since we began this process way back in September.  Honestly I threw out what I wanted should the others deem anything else trash worthy... whatever. Chuck it.  Only bother me if it's totally not clear if it's junk.

Monday, 7 December 2015

Waking Up Is Not Enough

I'm awake again today.  I know some people will find the following a little depressing but it's the truth.  I'm on an island, beautiful, nature is singing and the wind is howling on the beach behind my house.  The sun is shinning finally.  It does a lot of raining in winter and fall here.  Thunderstorms are the norm.  You may ask where here is.  It's the wonderful sunshiny island of Bermuda.  And that's where the wonder stops.  I could turn this into a 'why it's so sucktastic to be living here' blog but this is about me waking up.  So back to the point.

Sunday, 8 November 2015

Do I Write Gay Romance?

It may be time for me to accept something about my writing.   Let’s just start with the beginning of the blurb from my last novel Salinor.
In Salinor a prophecy is about to come true but it is held in secrets. Identities have been hidden and no one is who they appear to be. this is the world Leo and Danais have found themselves in. They are not who they thought they where; their friends and family are leading double lives; nothing is as it seems. 
So the above is the first paragraph.  Sadly, I used the wrong were, but as yet no one has pointed this out to me.  I wrote and edited my own blurb so clearly I missed that.  But I digress, what do you say does this have at all to do with GLBT, specifically male/male romance.  Everything.  This is a fantasy novel, yes.  It is about the journey of self-discovery of quite a few cast members but I had to pick two for the blurb and these two won out.  Are they in a relationship, yes they are.  Does this little paragraph say this?  Well of course it doesn’t.  Romance or relationships in general are the medium in which I choose to tell the stories that I write.  The stories themselves are always about something much bigger.

Saturday, 31 October 2015

Virgil Preview

My brother dutifully lived in fear as each day slowly but surely they stripped away more and more of any shred of human that he may have had in him.  At this rate, he might not even get to his eighth birthday before being robotized.  Still he appeared to become more and more like a normal child than he ever was the more this went on.  So normal in fact people stopped feeling sorry for him.  This, my evil Satanist parents, I mean my good God fearing Christian caretakers, took as success.  That a perfect human could indeed be molded by brute force.
The worst part is that like most fanatics, they claimed everything they did was in God’s name.  Keeping my brother pure.  Keeping him holy in God’s eyes.  Making sure that his entry into the Kingdom of Heaven was not only secure but beyond destruction.  My brother spent his days praying that heaven would come soon.  That he would wake up one day and it would all be over.  He accidentally said this prayer out loud once before bed.

Tuesday, 27 October 2015

Salinor Excerpt 2

S H a l i N I

Shalini thought about the present. Things had changed so fast. The children were now adults dealing with all the drama that adults deal with while simultaneously trying to figure out their place in the realm. This is what all people do when they grow up, but within the Alliance, the tension in this particular area was high. It was more about doing the best one could do for the entire realm, and not just deciding who to be. How would people’s talents better serve the people was the issue, no matter how low or high their position might be.
Things were different now. The children no longer called her ‘mother.’ They were calling their own parents that. Her time with them had come and gone. And now, here she was in The Wood in the most dangerous of times. The first time the children had been in The Wood was when the magic was at its peak, and the forest grew in strength and rejuvenated itself. She was sure the only reason she was alive was because they had a Lurgal escort. The king had been destroyed in a failed attempt of the enemy to claim territory on the borders of Keldon and Mironi. It was a brutal death. One arm was never found. His head was also disconnected.

Monday, 26 October 2015

Salinor Excerpt.

I promised that I'd post an excerpt if I hit 20 book sales yesterday and I did.  As of typing this I'm at 23 sales wish is more than enough to make me happy.  Thanks to everyone who's helped so far and… well that's it.  Don't want to keep you reading too much before the preview arrives :)
Retara’s information had proven to be quite helpful in the sense that they only lost two soldiers and five peasants. Without her, at least half the party might have perished. It was never good to lose people, but grieving was something they didn’t have time to do. They had made it to the beginning of fall and were just approaching the Wood of Children. Leo was feeling a little odd. He hadn’t been to the place of his birth in seven years. The emotions were slowly building up in him. He was starting to wonder if he could handle it.

Sunday, 11 October 2015

I'm Not Sorry

I've been meaning to write a blog for some time but truth be told I'm disheartened by this whole author thing.  I sometimes wonder why I do it.  I live perpetually in a world where all I do is sing and preach and stress over this author dream that I can't honestly say I whole heartedly believe in.  I sometimes wonder if all my enthusiasm is real or just a facade to hide much deeper issues.  Depression, anxiety, loneliness.  As if my drive and passion for my art is only a form of distraction from the truth that I am just generally, genuinely, and grotesquely unhappy with myself as a human being.  I don't really love life--well my life to be exact.  But that's neither here or there at present.  By the end of this blog post who knows I may totally contradict this first paragraph because this paragraph actually has nothing to do with what I set out to write when I started.  But the following will.

Sunday, 13 September 2015

Achievement Not Unlocked

I failed.  What did I fail at you might ask.  Well I guess I should start of with the truth.  That is that I lied.  I post a lot about me trying to become a full-time author.  Buy my books and blah blah blah and though that may be true.  It's a little disingenuous.  I've quite literally only had one real goal.  To help my mom buy a house.  Unlike all those 100k and 200k houses we see on HGTV all the time in 21.5 square mile Bermuda, an average let alone amazing house usually goes for around 500-750K and that's basic.  Like the one you get cause you can't afford anything else type basic.  Most are closer to 1million and beyond.  That's something we could never afford in this lifetime.  So I've  secretly been hoping at best, six books in that maybe just maybe I could quite possibly at the very least hit enough even if I had to give everything I had to do it.  I as of now, after astronomical cell bills, trying to promote books and the like, and two credit bills that i'm trying to get rid of, phone bill that will be turned of on tuesday but cleared on thursday, in full.  It's payday thursday.  Wordy sentence aside as of today I have zero in the bank and hardly noticeable book sales.

Wednesday, 26 August 2015

Help Me Win

So this is new for me.  Pimping out myself to win a contest.  Usually I'm trying to sell books.  I fail miserably at that but who knows.  This might actually work.  I'd be lying if I said i wasn't hoping on some level that I might garner a sale or two out of this.  But in reality, this is so far out of my comfort zone that I"m just going for it.  If reach 100, which is way of from the number one spot which is already over 20000 thousand i think.  In any case triple digits I would consider success.  I guess i'm at that stage where I have nothing to lose so why not hope that people for once might actually get on the bandwagon and help me do something.

Sunday, 19 July 2015

Failed Again

I feel I've made a mistake again with this book thing.  I love characters.  All my books are about placing characters in situations and seeing how they grow and come out of them.  As such a lot of those typical things you find in books don't exist.  I will probably never be a good writer because of this, but some things just bore me to tears.  If the book is about one thing, no, I do not need anything told to me about the characters that are not starring in this book.  As a reader I will just fabricate my own backstory.  I want to know what's going on in this book.  I"m also not a big fan of show don't tell.  Sometimes i'm like so the character has a permanently broken hand.  What does the story of how this hand got broken have to do with the story I am reading.  No i don't need the childhood story about him falling out of a tree and having a branch fall on his arm.  And if you must tell me.  Do it in a paragraph.  Not a few pages of backstory.  I honestly don't care.  All this stuff does is slow me the hell down.  I want to know about the story i'm reading.  And this intense need to tell me everything about everything is just overload.  Hell i've known my mom consciously for 30 out of my 34 years of life.  And there are still shitloads of things both new and old about her 50+ years of life I don't know.  That does nothing to diminish my opinion or like of her.  I've written four poems and about four blogs about this woman.  I don't need to know everything about her to know I think she's awesome.

Monday, 15 June 2015

What's That Got to do with it

So I'm single.  And this is me.  A work in I despise the gym progress.  But i do it anyway.  Personally in comparison to all the other guys in the gym I'm far from even anything moderately close to impressive.  The good thing there is I don't care.  The only person who needs to be happy is me.  But that's not what this post is about anyway.  

Anyone who has ever bitched about being single and then had someone tell you  something like, you're too cute to be single.  Or you don't smile in a picture and they're like 'you're too hot not to be smiling'. Oh and my favourite just being plain old depressed with life, 'you're too attractive to be sad'.  Fuck Fuck and Fuck.  What is wrong with people?  It doesn't matter if your short, tall fat, skinny, rich poor or a freakn muscle god--we are all human and perfectly susceptible to all things human.  Our attractiveness level has nothing to do with it.  It has nothing to do with it the same way money can't buy happiness either.   I"m just so done with people assuming that telling others that they are beautiful is the end all to be all and suddenly all their real life problems will melt into the abyss of 'but you're beautiful so you cant possibly have problems' sea.  So please, everyone, for the love of all things that make sense, and for all the people out there who are tired of the insensitive morons telling them things like this, just shut the fuck up.  

Sunday, 24 May 2015

My Musical Journey--Part 5

So.  Here is the fifth installment.  A few things have happened since my last post.  Now i desperately need people to click here, and here, or this musical dream will end up flushed away with the rest of the long lost desperate hopes of artists.  Yes I know artists breaking into the mainstream is a combination of hard work dedication and luck.  Shitloads of luck.  I'm still waiting on the luck part but i'm going to plug my shit in every thing I type from here until I die in hopes hard work will one day bring me the luck that I need.

Sunday, 17 May 2015

My Musical Journey-- Part 4

So here I am furthering into this journey into musical superstardom.  Tonight me and my composer will be officially writing music.  It has begun.  I spent four hours singing on her couch last saturday and barely made a dent in the musical.  But at least i got the plot out if not all the songs.  We are going to go in order in that way we can knock all the major numbers and mark out all the interludes and musical background stuff as we go, so we can come back and do all the none lyrical stuff last.  Smooth efficient and will allow for any snags to be fixed as opposed to just doing the songs in any old order.  Fix as we go, and pray nothing much needs to be changed.  Things will be, but there's always a fools hope they wont. All in all everything is looking up… sorta.

Monday, 27 April 2015

My Musical Journey--Part 3

Second edit complete and.  Feeling pretty good about my power.  I may not have the words memorised to every song but after this edit I can at least hum all my melodies, and no where all the ensemble cast bits are.  All musical jokes.  Any thing that is acapella.  What instruments are the feature in each songs and when and where they begin to play.  Where all the scenes are that have music as the backdrop for the dialogue but no singing.  Where every character theme, and other themes play during the musical.  Not bad for one week.  Not bad at all.  Now comes the fun stuff.  How many songs did I write.

Friday, 24 April 2015

My Musical Journey--Part 2

So here we are again.  One week in since last post.  Not bad for a second edit.  But before I get into that lets talk about something else.  So i did the first edit format, and so far no complaints.  In fact the more I look at it the more I'm glad a friend of mine sent me a copy of a play so I can see how musicals are formatted.  It actually looks way better than what I had.  Which just flat out didn't work.  Very unprofessional. 

So my journey through the second edit begins with my paroanoia.  See the plan was to read through it and find out where the hell anything with music actually was in the play.  I wrote it.  And edited it once.  So in theory I really only read it once and that first read was to format it and get rid of most spelling errors.  That amounts to....  I have no clue what's going on music wise other than the songs I wrote.

Sunday, 19 April 2015

My Musical Journey--Part 1

Within the zipper of this mystical blue artifact is the key to ultimate awesome.  A power that extends so far it could destroy a mere human.  But no need to fear I am not your typical human.  I'm not even close to being that avearage.  Much less in fact.  Okay okay, all jokes aside what this binder does hold is my musical.  Yes you read right.  In the past few weeks.  Six to be precise I have written a musical.  Dance numbers songs and all.  As of today I actually finished and printed my first edit.

Saturday, 4 April 2015

I'm Human Dammit

“Yeah the fact that I’m not out is always a problem,” I listened to the line, well in my head I was texting someone who said they had like the maddest crush on me and we were talking about dating and stuff like that.  It was never going to happen.  They were not out.  But they seemed nice enough to be a friend with.  And furthermore hot enough to have crazy animal wild beastly sex with.  And we were having normal conversation which is a rarity amongst most guys who hit me up.  Apparently the only sentences in existence are the type that explain the sexual deeds one wants to do to me. That is a blog post all on it's own--soon come.  Back to the point though, I’m reading this line thinking what is wrong with these people.  They are always so genuinely shocked this is a problem.  Fucking idiots.

Thursday, 26 February 2015

What Are You Looking For?

There are loads of things that we as readers look for in a book. Some of us love mystery, others comedy, others chicklit, and fantasy and... well the list is endless. Based on the obviousness of the genre of a book we will buy a book. But what about beyond that. I read a lot of fantasy, I get loads of it on my review blog. Most people who despise this is because of the magic and worlds and so on and so forth. But neither of those things are the core of why I like them. Yes they are important, but they aren't the bases for why fantasy novels make top list.